Today’s Jokes: Gates of Perception

Trumped at the Gate

Many years ago, a New York businessman was surprised to spot Bill Gates in the Seattle airport, calming tapping away at his laptop while waiting for a flight. Walking up to him, the businessman introduced himself:

“Hello, Mr. Gates. My name is Donald Trump and I can’t tell you how much I’ve admired you and Microsoft over the years.”

Sitting down next to Gates, Trump went on to sing the praises of Gates’ success and wealth, ending with a request:

“I hate to ask you this, but I have a very important business meeting with a man getting off the next flight that could change my future and I’d like to ask you a favor: I know it would seal the deal if you would come over and just say ‘Hello, Donald, how have you been?’ a couple of minutes after I sit down with my client. We’ll be right over there at the bar.”

Gates agreed, the plane landed, and Trump and his client took a table at the bar.

After a few minutes, Bill Gates walked up to the table and amiably said, “Hello, Donald, how have you been?”

“Not now, Gates,” replied Trump, “I’m in an important meeting!”


That’s a Different Story

Ever wonder how someone unsuited for the job rises to a high position? Here’s one way:

DAD: “I’ve picked out a girl for you to marry.”

SON: “Are you kidding? I’m not marrying some girl you just picked out for me!”

DAD: “It’s Bill Gates’ daughter.”

SON: “Oh, well, that’s a different story.”

(Later, Dad has a meeting with Bill Gates.)

DAD: “I want your daughter to marry my son.”

GATES: “Are you crazy? That’s not going to happen.”

DAD: “My son’s about to be appointed chairman of the World Trade Organization.”

GATES: “Oh, well, that’s a different story.”

(Dad has a meeting with the WTO’s board of directors.)

DAD: “I want you to appoint my son chairman of the WTO.”

BOARD PRESIDENT: “Ridiculous! We’ve never heard of your son and he has no background in business or international trade.”

DAD: “Maybe not, but he’s about to marry the daughter of Microsoft’s Bill Gates.”

BOARD PRESIDENT: “Oh, well, that’s a different story.”

(Years pass and Dad wants his Son to run for president of the United States. With that in mind, he makes an appointment with the Republican Party.)

DAD: “I want my son to be your party’s nominee for president next year.”

RNC CHAIR: “Are you kidding? He was a disaster as head of the WTO and quit before he was fired.”

DAD: “Maybe so, but he has the Gates family fortune behind him.”

RNC CHAIR: “Oh, well, that’s a different story.”

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